MAY. 2008. The Man With the Hat is Back.

MAY. 2008. The Man With the Hat is Back., originally uploaded by macslost.

So says George "Colostomy Bag of Mediocrity" Lucas.

Fingers crossed!

SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!!!!

SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!!!!, originally uploaded by macslost.

Happy Friday!

Happy Friday!, originally uploaded by macslost.

A little love from Tron-Guy.

Enjoy.

Region-Free apparently doesn't mean Crap-Free

revolver uk.jpg, originally uploaded by macslost.

Now that I have a region-free player, I've started collecting all those things I wanted to see but couldn't have because of the elitist trade sanctions that quarter the world into R1, R2, R3 and R4 (we do get to be #1, though). Anyway! I ordered some of all the above!

In Region 3 I got THE HOST, a Korean monster movie that's supposed to be awesome and just came out this year. Region 4 brought me DAYWATCH, the sequel to the awesome Russian vampire/fantasy action fest NIGHTWATCH as well as the hilarious Australian comedy KENNY. In the R2 arena I ordered ASTERIX & OBELIX: MISSION CLEOPATRA and Guy Ritchie's REVOLVER, two flix I have been waiting a long, long, long time to see. Asterix hasn't arrived yet, so Revolver became the 'christening' film for my new OPPO DVD player.

Well, let me be the first to tell you, there's a REASON Revolver never came out in the States. It's because it SUCKS. Man, when Madonna married Ritchie and stole his balls for her little collection, she really robbed the world. This flick has a plot that makes NO sense at all, the cinematography consists only of different colored films and cheap sets. The cast is weak (Jason Staham, Ray Liotta, Andre 3000, Vincent Pastore) and the dialogue is even worse. Avoid more than you would avoid Swept Away.

Guy Ritchie is dead.

Rest in peace.

THANK YOU SANTA! (for "Christmas Swag")

DSC00072.JPG, originally uploaded by macslost.

This Christmas kicked a lot of ass. It took about 4 hours to open all of the presents and there were only 6 of us. As you can see, goodies ran the gamut from books (cookbooks and otherwise) to food to knick-knacks, musical instruments, billiard supplies, kitchen appliances, digital awesomeness (Dinah got a new digital camera & iPod speaker dock and I got a region-free HDTV DVD player), framed art/pictures and much, much more.

So, being the greedy & materialistic people we are (albeit thankful as well) we neatly organized all of the loot on the table to we could bask in it's warm glow. (Dinah says it's so we wouldn't forget what we got so we could thank people, but we all know the truth.)

So now that I have all of my pool equipment (minus the 'crutch', i.e. the bridge you use for longshots) it's time to paint the garage and order the damn table.

Hey! He couldn't do that!

silsurf3.jpg, originally uploaded by macslost.

Here's the pretty-killer teaser for the upcoming Fantastic Four sequel. But a warning for nerds: THIS Silver Surfer can phase through buildings and buses. Soooo, there's your 'creative license' you can chuck in with "Rogue's too young", "Wolverine's too tall", "Spider-Man had web-shooters" and "Daredevil didn't suck ass".

Excelsior!

Houston, wii have a problem...

nintendo_wii_illus2.jpg, originally uploaded by macslost.

This site is awesome.

I'm really surprised that no one considered the inherent danger with giving gamers objects that require any sort of physical coordination.

Now, I'll be the first to admit that gamers have a fairly good grasp of the eye-hand coordination. However, when those are the only 2 parts of the human body that they use regularly, body kinesthetics aren't that high on their list of skills. In fact, the nunchuck and bowhunting skills on their resume are purely of the digital variety from playing too many MMORPGs.

But I digress. I think Nintendo, in facing the fact that these systems are expensive and only profit after users have bought several games, decided to make something that would break often and need replacing. The genius is that whatever happens is NOT THEIR FAULT. It's geniuses that swing their 'sword' or 'golf club' too hard and chuck the remote out the window or through the TV.

And now there's documentation.

Enjoy!

Keep this man working!

bateman-.jpg, originally uploaded by macslost.

Just because Wal-Merica didn't 'get' Arrested Development doesn't mean we shouldn't give more work to Jason Bateman! And so people HAVE.

He'll be rockin' in the upcoming action-psycho-fest Smokin' Aces and then Peter Berg's hot little Middle-Eastern action flick 'The Kingdom' with Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Garner & Chris Cooper will also feature a hairier-than-normal Bateman (not quite Teen Wolf Too hairy). Then, in the upcoming slapstick comedy starring Amanda Peet & Zach Braff, he'll play a man in a wheelchair competing for the girl. Both of which look AWESOME.

And if those two weren't enough, he'll star in the upcoming Will Smith superhero drama 'Tonight, She Comes' (yeah, suck-ass title), which has a pretty sweet premise:

"Smith plays a down-and-out superhero who has a bad image with the public because he causes a lot of collateral damage while he solves crime, and he's an alcoholic. Bateman plays a corporate public relations consultant, who after being rescued by Smith tries to repay him by revamping his image. But while Bateman is trying to repair Smith's reputation the superhero is secretly romancing Bateman's alluring wife played by Theron." (courtesy of SuperHeroHype.com)

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Love, Optimus

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Love, Optimus
Originally uploaded by macslost.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

xmas door.JPG
Originally uploaded by macslost.

As the week winds down, packages start piling up at the front door and the holiday cards are spilling over everywhere. I LOVE Christmas. Christmas means good times, good presents and going to the movies with family.

As an impulsive shopper myself, I can do all of my Christmas shopping pretty fast and easy once I get in the mindset to do it. I pulled the stops out this year and I think Dinah'll be pretty damn pleased with her goodies. Back to my point on the impulse thing, though. Because I literally think "Oh, I could use that" a split second before I click on the "Buy" button or plot my weekly 'Round the Valley in 80 Minutes" shopping sprees, it makes me somewhat difficult to shop for. So this year I actually made a list of things that I wanted, which I really haven't done in quite some time. See, I actually gave it THOUGHT this year instead of just going "Oh, what's coming out in the next 2 weeks that I can patiently wait and see if someone got me."



Of course, the list I made this year wasn't cheap. Region-Free DVD player (upgradeable to Hi-Def), new electric razor, cue sticks, Guitar Hero II, Universal remote (a GOOD ONE), 36-bottle wine fridge. And some books. But the list is honest and it's really all I NEED (I say this because my wants and needs vary. I want every DVD ever made, I don't necessarily need those. These things I do need.)

But prezzies aside, I love the decorations, the cold, the Christmas movies and, of course, my Mom's Chex Mix. Which will be consumed while watching horror movies on New Years Day. But that's another holiday for another post.

So have a very Merry Christmas and we'll see y'all soon!

And the Surfer appears!

And the Surfer appears!
Originally uploaded by macslost.

First pic of the boarder from FF2 this summer has arrived! Looks like the Silver Surfer is going to be uh, silver. Not much to twist on that one, is there?

.Mac sucks

mac sucks.jpg
Originally uploaded by macslost.

UGH! I thought I was soooooo clever when I started my new business with an e-mail address at mac.com. "Oh, look at me, mcleanpr@mac.com, how cool am I?!" Well you know what?! That was the worst $100 I have ever spent. Well, second worst. The first was some weird Canadian lottery scam I bought when I was drunk in college. So this is second to that.

Word to the wise: Yahoo Small Business. OK, that's 3 words, but you get my point.

(and on a side note, Hotmail is actually getting WORSE. I'm gonna have to switch to Gmail soon, methinks.)

WTF!?

WTF!?
Originally uploaded by macslost.

Sure, it looks like the same kind of "look it's a gun, but it doesn't look like a real one so it decreases the likelihood of a cop shooting your kid in the face" gun, but, uh, it's not a water gun. It's, um, 'ooze'. You pump it. And ooze comes out. On your friends face.

Merry Christmas!

TRANSFORM THIS!!!!

Holy CRAP! This movie is gonna RUUUUUULE!

I'm burning my passport

I swear to God, the more movies I watch, the less I want to travel. My buddy Alf and I just saw Blood Diamond today. Or it's full title, Blood Diamond: Africa Sucks. I don't think 10 minutes went by in the film without a kid murdering people or someone getting their hands chopped off or shot in the face. So add Africa to the no-travel list.

A few weeks ago Alf and I also saw Apocalypto, another grueling action-epic just packed with random acts of violence every 3-4 minutes. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed Apocalypto immensely (in the same way I enjoy things like Die Hard, Payback, etc.) The point being, this movie (I know, I know, it's set in the PAST) but coupled with Anaconda and City of God (and the now playing or gone Turistas) I went ahead and added South America to the list as well.

The downside to Diamond though is that there a lame-ass "where did THAT come from" romance between Leo and Jennifer Connolly. It's just bad. I think there's 30 minutes of love story on the cutting room floor, because it makes no sense. That and the 30-minute ending. Ugh! We get it. Diamonds are bad. And so is Africa. I mean DAMN. I think it's time for The Gods Must Be Crazy 3.

Anyway, my point being is that I've gone ahead and added Africa to my list of places I don't wanna go to. Which includes South America, the Middle East, most of Eastern Europe, a good chunk of Asia, the middle of America and Skull "Shithole" Island. Frankly, I don't want to get eaten (dead or alive), dismembered, imprisoned, tortured or shot. Think what you want of me, but I think I'll stick to 1st world travel, thank you very much.

Awesomeness awaits us...

Spring is in the air. OK, not really. It's still Winter, but Spring is coming. Now, this is probably the first Christmas season in a while where I want to see pretty much every single thing being released, so it's gonna be a busy few weeks, for sure. Dream Girls, Rocky Balboa, The Good Shepard, Night at the Museum, the list is pretty long. But all of these films will be up our noses for the next 2-3 months for the Academy push and all that. What *I* want are my Spring goodies.

Grindhouse just posted the full-length trailer and it is AWESOME.



300 also just posted it's full length trailer. It'll make you CRY.



More Hostel flicks from Eli Roth, too. How's this for a poster?



Speaking of which, The Hitcher remake with Sean Bean is out soon as well.

And if those weren't tasty enough, how about TWO killer crocodile movies?!

PRIMEVAL hits first and then ROGUE!

Primeval has a pretty sweet poster, too.



And don't forget Smokin' Aces, which is gona rock my face off in a "what the hell just happened" psychotic melee of gunfire.

Plus Pan's Labyrinth is out soon, as is Children of Men. I have to say, Jan-April always brings me such gleeful joy. This summer is going to be STUPID with insanely huge movies, but we'll go there later. Let us enjoy the coming Spring, first.

NEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS!

NEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS!
Originally uploaded by macslost.

So a few weeks back, me and m'man Allistair hit Spike TV's VGA awards. I learned some valuable life lessons there. First off, I was more than a little surprised to see how many hot chicks were in attendance. I certainly remember the time when video games were a definitely a massive strike against you when it came to girls. (granted, some of them were hookers used for a segment on the show).

Second, nerds are alive and well. This scrawny kid behind us was the epitome of NERD. Skinny, XL shirt, wispy mustache and a high-pitched voice, with which he used to constantly make nerd comments throughout the show. All he was missing was the snort-laugh.



Third: Barry Bostwick hates nerds. While we were sitting in the balcony, I glanced over a few seats and saw Barry sitting there, by himself with this look on his face that suggested maybe his doctor had given him a prostate exam a few moments earlier. He just squiiiirmed. (he had a small segment on the show, which explained why he was there at all.)

Four: 50 Cent can't read. BIIIIG teleprompter with lots of baaaad jokes. 50 Cent just says, "here's an award and the winner is blah". And leaves. Awesome.

Fifth thing: the writers on the show think nerd jokes from the eighties are still funny. "All your bases" type jokes. You guys suck. Seriously. At one point, some shitty band who was presenting actually apologized for some crappy joke they read off the teleprompter.

Six: Sam 'The Man' Jackson has NO shame. HE is a NERD. And cool as hell. He actually took Barry's seat later in the show, which was awesome. Oh, and we were both on TV when Sam did his intro to crapfest band AFI. What a bunch of no-talent ass clowns. But we got to sit by Sam Jackson so that was cool.



Lastly, Tenacious D really does rock live. Pyrotechnics and all that good stuff. They played "The Metal" and had the big Metal-Monster stomping around on the stage. The whole stage was actually a huge LED display and they stomped a portion of it out and they had to fix it in the middle of the show. Awesome.

We left early to get food, but we didn't miss much, that's for sure.

NEEEEERDS!

Lost Room!

Lost Room!
Originally uploaded by macslost.

So the Sci-Fi channel is notorious for their awful, awful, awful "Original Movies". Seriously, it's unapologetically bad. I mean, Dean Cain stars in most of them if that tells you anything. Anyway, their mini-series actually happen to be pretty good. That being said, The Lost Room was AWESOME. The premise is that there are a certain number of objects from a hotel room that all have different powers attached to them. A comb can freeze time for 10 seconds when you run it through your hair, a watch hard boils eggs, a radio makes you 3 inches taller when tuned to a specific station. Weird stuff. It's a great mystery with lots of cool knick-knacks. And if you groan at the fact that Elle fanning (Dakota's little sister) is in it, don't fret, she disappears at the very beginning, which is the whole plot of the film.

So check it out on a rerun!

Exit, Stage Left

Exit, Stage Left
Originally uploaded by macslost.

Mr. Joe Barbera passed away this past Monday at the ripe old age of 95.

See? Cartoons keep you young, folks. Watch more & live longer.

No More Jibba Jabba

No More Jibba Jabba
Originally uploaded by macslost.

YYYYYYO!

So Ain't It Cool News is doing something pretty damn awesome. Apparently, Sylvester Stallone called them up and asked if he could answer fan's questions, 10 a day, for 20 days on the site. And they can ask ANYTHING. From Rocky to The Italian Stallion to Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot. And he'll ANSWER.



I've read a few days worth already and truly, it's a GREAT read. He talks about how much Get Carter sucked, where he messed up with directing Staying Alive, working with Dolly Parton, the stunts on Night Hawks, why his kid in the new Rocky movie is too old for Rocky continuity (brain damage on his part. he says he should have tossed in a line of dialogue stating that his kid has a disease that ages him 3 months every 90 minutes)



Anyway, it's through December 20th and you should add it to your daily reading. It's good stuff!

Christmas NOW

So now that it's the Christmas season, it's time to represent!

This weekend was spent hitting up all sorts of Christmas goodness and a great way to kick off the December X-Mas madness. (X-Mas by far my favorite holiday. well, maybe tied with Halloween, but there's a whole MONTH to celebrate X-Mas.)

Anyway, Friday night we ended up scoring tickets to A John Waters Christmas at UCLA. It was hilariously filthy and everything I hoped it would be. We went with with good friends Amanda and Eyad and lo & behold, 4 seats to my right? Good friends Alf & Danielle! Which was a total surprise. Mostly because I didn't read Alf's blog earlier in the day. Anyway! Good time had by all.

Saturday I started untangling and hanging the lights on the house. I only succeeded in finishing the two front bushes before having to go work a silly event on the Disney lot, but after that Dinah & I hit up the Merry Members night at the Zoo!



We scored some hot chocolate and churros (best reason to go to the zoo! well, after animals, I guess) and got our photo snapped with the Christmas Monkey! After that we wandered a bit and came to realize that this type of event was really for kids, so we wandered merrily back out. Eating a churro, of course. (Side note: This piece of 'art' is in the petting zoo area. No matter what angle you stand at, the kids hand is up the goat's ass. WTF?)



On the way home we started planning on when/where we should get a tree and Dinah mentioned there was one in the lot hidden in the Ghetto-Mall by our house. So in a moment of spontaneity, we were all, like, "Let's just get it now!" So we did. It's a beautiful tree, it was totally cheap and the fine folks at the little lot were super sweet and even tied it to the roof of my car for us! Rock on. Now the house smells all pine-needly.



So! Today is finishing the lights! Decorating the tree! And hitting up Holiday Party #1 with at Alf & Danielle's.

Merry Christmas! Wooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bid'ness cards have arrived!

Well, as a free man, senior consultant, freelancer, mercenary, whatever, I need cards. Business Cards. Alf recommended this great new function through Flickr where they make cards FOR you. You get to choose the backs of ALL the cards or each INDIVIDUAL one. How awesome is that?! So I spent an entire afternoon browsing the internet and choosing images from 100 different flicks! Now when I hand out cards, people can choose based on film preferences! Pick a card, any card. Kick ASS.

Do Lego skeletons have souls?

Captain Awesome chewed up one of my Halloween Lego skeletons. I think I had pumpkin pie on my fingers when I put it together, so it must have smelled pretty good. Never found the head, though.