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Thursday, June 22, 2006

The weekend cometh

Modern Drunk
Originally uploaded by macslost.
No more half-assing it. It's time to represent! I found out about this at the first annual convention back in 2004. Then I missed the one in 2005. So we'll make the 3rd one this year!

There'll be much revelry and learning. Since it is a convention they DO have guest speakers and documentaries. So I'll gain some knowledge. If I remember it.

An example of the learning to be had:

- The Evils of Prohibition: Hooch historian Richard English recounts the Stupidest Idea Ever.

Plus there will be burlesque. Lots and lots of burlesque. Which is a good thing. And bands. Dirty, dirty bands. Except Upper Crust. They actually where powdered wigs and frilly clothes. Awesome. Sweet. Kick Ass. Rocque on. (seriously though, check out their website)

Plus it's in downtown Vegas, which I've never been to, so I won't be immediately bored since Vegas (the strip) is a once-a-year type excursion and I was just there 2 months ago for the Scrubs DVD launch party.

Lucha! Va Voom! Lucha! Va Voom!

Lucha! Va Voom! Lucha! Va Voom!
Originally uploaded by macslost.
Wrestling is fake.

Or is it? What exactly are they faking? I do, in fact, see them wrestling. There's grabbing, throwing, pinning, bitchslapping (not sure if that's in 'real' wrestling rules) and of course, spandex.

I've never been a fan of pro-wrestling, but after I had to work backstage at one of the 'Stampede' tours, I gained a somewhat-healthy respect for it. Here you have 7-foot, 400 pound man-mountains jumping on each other, throwing each other onto tables (carefully sawed underneath to control damage/injury) and yet rarely does someone ever get carted off on a stretcher. (though once, when I was little and watching G.L.O.W., one chick had to be carried of in pain because another one was biting her toes and wouldn't let them go. So both were carried off. amazing.)

But I digress.

Tuesday night, my friend Alf generously invited me to see Lucha Va Voom, a Mexican wrestling match complete with midgets and burlesque. Hot DAMN, don't have to ask me twice!!

First off, the show is FUNNY. The outfits, the comedic commentary, the homo (phobic, sure) cowboys in front of us, the awesome Mexican wrestling movies from the 60s and 70s playing on big screens.

Anyway, I'm sure you can guess what the majority of the evening looked like, so I'll point out the highlights!

- Midget wrestling. First off, there's FOUR midget wrestlers. One team is ripped like Jesus (muscular) and wearing spandex, like little superheroes. The other team? Here's where it gets SWEET. A fat Ninja and a fatter Pirate! With an eyepatch!!!

-Gay wrestlers! There were a lot of them. The real treat was when a big fat biker dude got knocked down against the corner post and this little gayboy in frilly pink speedos wrapped his legs around the biker dude's head and the post and started grinding him in the face. It was AWESOME.

- The Hurricane (I think that was his name). Tall, rail-thin muscle-bound black dude with a fro wearing khakis. He totally did the shuffle right into a dude's nuts while the guy was down. It was the best thing I ever saw.

- Gypsy Rose. Two mostly naked chicks spinning on rings in the air without any pansy ropes or harnesses either.

- The Bollywood stripper. She was just plain hott.

- Rocky Ricochet (I think that was his name. I forgot the brochure!). Take a mental journey with me. The stage is dark. Then the lights come up and there's a giant rocket ship (made of foam, like a walking pizza mascot for small pizzerias or something.) It starts bouncing around the stage. Really high. WTF? It's on a pogo stick! So the rocket comes apart (still pogo-ing. the pogo never stops going) and inside is an atronaut, complete with the big helmet. Then the guy starts pulling off his chest plate, helmet, legs, arms, and 2 speedos full of glitter. AND HE NEVER STOPS POGO-ING (to be fair, he accidentally hopped off the stage into the audience once, still pogo-ing, but fell halfway back up the steps. quick recovery, though) Anyway, it was a damn good show and the not-gay cowboys in front of me seemed to enjoy it as well. Maybe with a little protest just for show.

And this was just what was BEST. The entire show was pretty spectacular and I highly recommend hitting it up next time it's going on down at The Mayan.

Sex And Death 101

Sex And Death 101
Originally uploaded by macslost.
There's a new movie in the works called Sex And Death 101.

The story follows a man (Simon Baker) whose life is upended by a mysterious e-mail containing the 101 names of every woman he has had sex with and, eerily, every woman he will have sex with in the future. He is stopped in his tracks when he meets a femme fatale (Winona Ryder, but the photo to the right is from A Scanner Darkly, so don't get confused) who targets men guilty of sex crimes against women.

Sounds kinda cool, right? Maybe a little Gondry/Jonze-ish?

Then I read an interview with the director:

"The way that the script originally ended is Winona Ryder's character talks about her backstory, and it was her abusive husband screaming at her on the phone at his job, and he was a trader at the World Trade Center, and, like, the plane comes and blows it up. So she thinks like September 11th was like this great cataclysmic cleansing experience, and after that she decides to become a serial killer."

Fortunately, that joke didn't make it into production, he said. "It certainly did not," he said, adding: "Note to all writers out there: Always put a September 11th third act, so you have something to change to make the producers happy. Like, 'OK, I guess I'll change the September 11th third act, but you have to let me have the attempted necrophilia scene.'" (from Sci-Fi.com)

I laughed and laughed and then saw that the guy was Daniel Waters, who wrote Heathers.

Hell. Yes.

(Note: He also wrote Hudson Hawk, The Adventures of Ford Fairlane, Batman Returns and Demolition Man. Which in my book is even BETTER, cuz those movies make me LAUGH.)

Blasted Evil-Doers! Foul Villains!

Lex Luthor has completely vandalized the Superman Returns website. It's HILARIOUS. There are 9 downloadable wallpapers that have each been completely graffitied by Lex Luthor.

It's awesome.

Cristal iz OUT

Out With Cristal
Originally uploaded by macslost.
Looks like the French have had it with Cristal's rap-endorsements.

How awesome is it, that Jay-Z and his fellow rappers have reached the point in their careers where they get in fights with the French and BOYCOTT $700 bottles of champagne.

Not over territory, women, money or business. Over CHAMPAGNE.

It's just priceless. The best excerpt:

Asked by the magazine if the association between Cristal and the "bling lifestyle" could be detrimental, Rouzaud replied:

"That's a good question, but what can we do? We can't forbid people from buying it. I'm sure Dom Perignon or Krug would be delighted to have their business."

Do you think they'll all go back and change the their rap lyrics, too?

Good Night and Good GOD! What happened?!

As you know, movie posters are pretty crappy these days. Looks like Chinese DVD Pirates figured out how to fix that problem and spice up the business a little. She must have been in one of the deleted scenes.

Actually, how funny would it be if pirates totally spliced in new footage? Awesome.

Angie loves the little chiiiiiiiildren...

All the children of the woooooooorld.

On the surface, it seems like Angelina Jolie's doing a very generous thing, adopting a child..or two..from third world countries. She adopts two, that's great, has one of her own (which looks normal for now, I thought it would just be a giant jaw with legs or something) and right afterwards? Not enough, I want more. (kind of like tattoos or cereal box toys):

"We don't know which which country. But we're looking at different countries," the actress tells [Anderson] Cooper. "And we're I'm just it's gonna be the balance of what would be best for Mad and for Z right now. It's, you know, another boy, another girl, which country, which race would fit best with the kids."

They aren't puppies! And WTF does a baby know about another kid? Anyway, not the point. Here's where my concern starts to kick in:

Angelina: "1 Cambodian boy. Check. 1 Ethiopian girl. Check. 1 American boy. Check. What's next on the list?"

Brad: "I don't know, I can't read God's handwriting. When did he say it was gonna rain again?"

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

NBC First Looks

NBC First Looks
Originally uploaded by macslost.
NBC has put up 2-4 minute clips from all ther new shows for the fall. There's some good stuff in here, man! Heroes, 30 Rock, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, The Singles Table, Kidnapped and Andy barker, P.I.



Originally uploaded by macslost.

This, dear friends, is a treat beyond the treats from the teats of the Gods. Someone has 'Simpson-ized' the entire cast of BATTLESTAR GALACTICA. Yes, you heard me, EVERYONE.

Witness the glory.

What Superhero Alter-Ego Haircut Do YOU Have?

When I see stuff like this, and the Simpson-ized Battlestar Galactica, it makes me feel both overjoyed and also disappointed in myself for not trying to do something like this myself.

And then I get over it. It's called 're-purposing' folks. You don't have to create anything when you can just move it from one place to another.

DemonBaby, you are genius. Or at least, you have a lot of damn freetime on your hands. Here's the first annual contest as well.

Damn, we're good looking!

Damn, we're good looking!
Originally uploaded by macslost.
So Dinah posted the story of how we went to a taping of Last Comic Standing and how we were on the show last week, but now it's seriously eating into our 15 minutes. Apparently we were in the promo for this week's episode for an entire week, plus we showed up twice together and Dinah showed up 2 more times after that in last night's episode. I guess the editors couldn't get enough of us!

Seriously though, do reruns count as part of your 15 minutes of fame? Cuz that would suck.

Fantasy Football...

Fantasy Football...
Originally uploaded by macslost.
. . . is just Dungeons an Dragons for the jocks that made fun of you for playing D&D as a kid.

That's the best joke I have ever heard.

The Humble Beginnings of a Saw and His Boy

Let the stories never end.

Here's the poster for the Texas Chainsaw Massacre prequel.

Oh yeah.

Oooohhh, yeah.

The saw is family.

Oh Coffee, How Do I Love Thee?

Oh Coffee, How Do I Love Thee?
Originally uploaded by macslost.
While I enjoy drinking coffee, I'm not necessarily one who needs it to function. At least, I didn't THINK so.

Now I have discovered the hidden magic inside.

Drink, my friends, DRINK!!!

Captain Awesome and Miss Moneypenny


For the full story on how Miss Moneypenny joined our motley crew, you can pop over to Puff Piece. Dinah's got the full rag-to-riches story.

And Lucas' Rape Spree Continues

And Lucas' Rape Spree Continues
Originally uploaded by macslost.
As if screwing over all of us 3 times in a row in the theaters, and again with his non-anamorphic DVD editions of the original trilogy this fall wasn't enough (seriously, they're just copying the 90's laserdiscs onto DVD). Lucas decided that it might be best for everyone if he just destroy any hope of getting something real out of him in the future as well.

ILM is selling off their props & models division. That way eveything he does can be CGI.

Yay for you George, yay for you.

Can someone please just send a virus to wipe out Lucas Ranch at this point?

To Fly Or Not To Fly?

To Fly Or Not To Fly?
Originally uploaded by macslost.
Here's my dilemma. I HAVE tickets to the 6/27 IMAX showing of Superman Returns. I hear there's a 20 minute battle in 3-D. THREE-DEE. Dude, I haven't seen a movie in 3-D since Nightmare on Elm Street: Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare (well, final at the time, at least). Anyway, I HAVE my tix for that. But now my company has screenings popping up on the 18th and 22nd. Do I be impatient and see it in less-than-IMAX now? Or wait and see it for the first time in it's full glory?


I think I have to show some restraint.

Stupid restraint.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

TV brings great joys...and pains

TV brings great joys...and pains
Originally uploaded by macslost.
The Onion's A.V. Club has created a lovely list of the people we loved to hate. I found myself agreeing with, well, all of them.

@#^%@$ Junk Mail Filter!!

@#^%@$ Junk Mail Filter!!
Originally uploaded by macslost.
I missed the show! Damn. Sometimes it's best not to look in the 'Junk' folder.

It'll spare you from getting your feeling hurt.

Dreams smothered.

Hopes crushed.

Maybe Jean-Claude Van Damme will be performing at House of Blues soon...or does Bruce Willis own that space?

Manatee. It's what's for dinner.

Manatee. It's what's for dinner.
Originally uploaded by macslost.
Apparently they're no longer on Florida's endangered species list.

Rub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the grub, yay God!

Monday, June 05, 2006

Marvel's Secret Wars!!!

Originally uploaded by macslost.
The latest to be added to the live action mix!!! See Spidey in the black costume here first! No, no, not like in Spider-Man 3, but in SPACE where he actually found it! (Due to budgetary issues, 'space' was replaced with a park in Culver City)

Truly, a sight to be hold.

DAMN. It's too beautiful for words. Forget Transformers, stretch this out a little, add some CGI and get it in theaters!

Thanks to Jeff at Evil Marketing who found the thing.