What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs, Rolls over your neighbor's dog? What's great for a snack and fits on your back? It's Blog, Blog, Blog! It's Blo-og, Blo-og, it's big, it's heavy, it's wood. It's Blo-og, Blo-og, it's better than bad, it's good! Everyone wants a Blog! You're gonna love it, Blog! Come on and get your Blog! Everyone needs a Blog!

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

The 'Best' of 2006: Part 3

Holy crap, this was funny. I was coughing at a few moments and the Pamela Anderson wedding sack sequence was hilarious (though probably staged). This movie has some of the best awkward comedy moments since the BBC's The Office, only this stuff is totally real. And the fact that people tried to sue for being portrayed as the idiots they are just makes it all the more worthwhile. Plus the junket pieces that were staged with Cohen in character were hilarious. WARNING: The naked wrestling and chase through the hotel will make you laugh, cry AND hurl.


Hot DAMN. My man crush with Daniel Craig happened when I saw Layer Cake, which I only saw because I heard that Matthew Vaughn was going to be directing X-Men 3 (later screwed by Brett Ratner). Layer Cake is an AWESOME Brit crime-drama and has one of the best endings in a film ever. So when Clive Owen decided that he didn't want to be Bond (which I can't blame him, he's an amazing actor as well and picks really interesting roles) and they chose Craig, I was ecstatic. This movie is BRUTAL. It shows Bond's beginning as a thug and the only reason he was chosen to be a 00 was because he could play cards. The torture scene in the film was nothing bu a rope with a knot in the end and was the most gruelling torture scene since's Hard Candy's table-top surgery and Hostel's blowtorch scene. My stomach still gets queasy thinking about it. Plus the opening segment featuring Parkour co-inventor Sebastien Foucan and a race through a construction site is mind-boggling good.


I loved this movie. It was INTENSE, but man, it was GOOD. What amazed me was how this epic story featured first-time actors who were flawless. I never fell out of the story. Well, once, but that birth sequence was pretty lame. All in all, the action sequences were great, the jokes were pretty funny, the villains were E-Vil and the violence was in abundance. By abundance I mean somebody was being clubbed, stabbed, beheaded, gutted or speared about every 30 seconds. Well, that's an exaggeration, but a lot of the movie had you clenched up like the first 20 minutes of Saving Private Ryan. It was a damn good time.

Rocky_Balboa - Poster.jpg

Yeah, yeah, go ahead and rant on at how lame another Rocky movie is. Blah, blah, blah. But you know what? it was really good. Let's look at the history, too. See, most people were mad that there was another Rocky movie because 5 was so bad. But be FAIR. 1 out of 5 flops and we're angry about this why? Rocky 1-4 were staples of everyone's childhood. Seeing Rocky overcome his opponents and NOT ALWAYS win was also a huge deal. What made 'Rocky Balboa' was that it took itself seriously in a very self-deprecating manner. Rocky is old. He's a has-been. A small-time local celebrity who runs a tiny restaurant and tells patrons his boxing stories. His romantic interest is in her late 30's, early 40's, not late 20's. He's a bit punch-drunk. He's OLD. And they use that as the basis of the story. I tell ya, it was a damn fine film to watch. What really made it cool was that the end credits featured clips from a documentary that filmed everyone who ran up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art for a year and asked them why they did it. So during the credits, there was a long montage featuring everyone: kids, grandparents, sororities, office workers, joggers, business men and anyone else you can think of running up and dancing at the top. It's a pretty cool statement that people still do that 30 years after ROCKY came out.


Lookee-lookee, how did DREAM GIRLS make it into Mac's list? This is insane. Must be a typo. Oddly enough? No. I really dug it. The music was great, the 3-decade story was compelling, the acting was damn good, the songs were consistent, so you didn't fall in and out of the story and the costumes were awesome. The closing credits of this one was total Oscar-pandering, since it featured each actor in all the different costumes they wore and had all the set sketches next to the final set pieces running through the background. It was good to see Eddie do something that didn't cater to kids or fart jokes.

children of men.jpg

DAMN. It's already come up several times that I love Clive Owen. He's turning into a great every-man/bad-ass like Harrison Ford/Bruce Willis/Mel Gibson were in their hey-day. In 'Children', he plays an everyman thrust into smuggling the world's only pregnant woman out of the country before the government and various religious/political groups discover her. Michael Caine plays a hysterical pot-growing hippie and friend to Clive. There are some brutal action sequences in this one as well as an amazing 8-minute single-shot battle scene near the end. The other bonus is that it also stars Chiwetel Ejiofor, who is pretty high on my favorite actor list at the moment. Heeey, how is it the Brits are making a comeback? Hm.


Ah, Guillermo. You had me at "attached to direct". Guillermo Del Toro has a great eye for things bug-like in nature. If he could have a man-sized monster in all of his films, he probably would. The first time I ever looked him up was when I saw a little film called Cronos while I was in college. Then came Mimic, which was a pretty creepy flick. Not a great movie, mind you, but it got him into Hollywood, where we would later get Blade 2 and the almighty Hellboy, so that's a GOOD thing. Pan's Labyrinth is a part war/part fantasy flick set during the Spanish Revolution, much like his ghost story The Devil's Backbone. The violence in Labyrinth takes place entirely in the real world and it's some pretty brutal stuff. The fantasy element is amazing, to which I wanted more of it every time she had to come back to the real world. This is one of those movies I don't want to spoil, so I'll leave it at the last great film of 2006.


One more added!!! I didn't get to see this one until a few weeks into January, but it still counts. This makes the 'Best' list because it made me squeal like a giddy schoolboy for pretty much the entire time. I've always loved going to the Natural History Museums of pretty much any city. They usually rank just below Zoos and bars, so I miss a lot of them, but they are always a good time. This movie has a hilarious "what if" concept that never really disappoints and anyone who ever enjoyed a trip to the museum will relate to pretty much every joke in the movie. So 'nuff said on that.

To be fair, there are some things I didn't see that may or may not have made it on the fave list, primarily being Harsh Times, which looked like a 'Training Day' (which I LOVED) with Christian Bale and Jackass 2, which I am pissed that I missed, but have a copy being sent to me shortly, so that problem will be corrected.

And that's that! I patiently await the next 3 movies of 2007 that should be entertaining! Ghost Rider (2/16), Reno 911: Miami (2/23) and Black Snake Moan (2/23).

Didn't see: Jackass 2, This Film Is Not Yet Rated, Harsh Times

Labels: , , , , , , , , ,

Coming Soon To A Garage Near You

Coming Soon To A Garage Near You, originally uploaded by macslost.

It's done. I finished the garage. Everything is in it's place. And it's MAGNIFICENT. Well, magnificent in a college-dorm play-room type of way. I'd say frat-basement, but those are skanky and there's usually sports-type crap around and I don't care about that.

So, now we wait for the pool table to be delivered and installed! Which should (knock on wood) be around the 15th!

Labels: , ,

Swings & Misses

Swing & a Miss!, originally uploaded by macslost.

Lots of misses, actually. I was a die-hard Stephen King fan until he started releasing trash like Gerald's Game. That's when I quit reading. His movies on the whole haven't been all that bad, but the TV shows have been craaaaaaap. And that's what's mostly been showing for quite some time. But 2007 promises to be different (I hope). First up, 1408, a ghost story with John Cusack and Sam Jackson. Early word on this is that it's awesome and the trailer seems to support that. Following that is THE MIST, which I have been waiting, oh, 15 years to see, for sure. It's about monsters in the fog that are trying to get at a group of people holed up in a grocery store. "Ten Little Indians"-style. Thomas Jane and Andre Braugher are in it, so I'm all good. Plus I hear that Creepshow is getting another go. I dug those movies growing up. My favorite one was 'The Raft' from Creepshow 2. I hate swimming in lakes. More than the ocean, if you can believe that.

Labels: , ,

Censorhip CAN be funny

Censorhip CAN be funny, originally uploaded by macslost.

If Jimmy Kimmel does it.

Check it out.

The 'Best' of 2006: Part 2

In the midst of Pirates of the Caribbean 2 and Superman Returns, Fox Searchlight dropped this little gem out as counter-programming. I'm an unabashed Steve Carrell fan, plus the addition of Greg Kinnear (who's had one of the best comeback careers ever) and Toni Collette and Alan Arkin, it seemed like a sure thing. And it WAS. I laughed my ass off from beginning to end, but I think the best thing about it was the constant anticipation to what, exactly, the performance was going to be, as you only got hints of it, much like Napoleon Dynamite's end performance. While it isn't as awesomely choreographed as that, it does hold up and I was on the floor by the end.

The_Descent - Poster.jpg

God bless eBay. I read about this movie a year and a half ago. I was already a big fan of Neil Marshall after he directed the awesome Dog Soldiers, about a group of National Guardsman (UK version) being hunted by werewolves while on maneuvers. Neil does a GREAT job of the pick-em-off-one-by-one horror genre. Personally, I think the 'Ten Little Indian" plot device is probably my favorite of the action/horror genre because it usually means fun death scenes. But I digress. I bought this DVD a year ago on eBay and watched it by myself in the dark and it stressed me the hell out! Creepy-ass Golum things hanging out underground and slaughtering (& eating) 6 adventure-chicks. Which I appreciated, because there was no real clue as to who would die or not since they were all very capable people. Plus the actual characters and the inter-personal relationships were really done well. Plus a giant pool of blood and lots of bones and slaughtery-death-stuff, which was paramount.


I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger."

"Dear little baby Jesus, who's sittin' in his crib watchin the Baby Einstein videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors. I would like to thank you for bringin' me and my moma together, and also that my kids no longer sound like retarded gang-bangers. "

"I like to think of Jesus like with giant eagles wings, and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an angel band and I'm in the front row and I'm hammered drunk! "

"Dear Lord baby Jesus, or as our brothers in the south call you, jesuz, we thank you so much for this bountiful harvest of Dominos, KFC, and the always delicious Taco Bell. I just want to take time to say thank you for my family. My two beautiful, beautiful, handsome striking sons, Walker, and Texas Ranger, or TR as we call him. And of course my red hot smokin' wife Carley, who is a stone cold fox."

"Dear 8 pounds 6 ounces baby Jesus, new born, not even spoken a word yet. "

Jesus was a man! He had a beard!"

"I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life."

"I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo T-Shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I'm here to party. "


(SIGH) This is what I hate about Wal-Merica. If they 'don't get it', it doesn't get released. This movie was latest installment from Mike Judge and has been sitting around for about 2-3 years before being unceremoniously dumped in about 10 theaters across the country. Shaaaaaaame. This movie is HILARIOUS. The basic premise aside, what made it completely sad and yet plausible was the opening segment where two couples are portrayed. The first, a smart and successful couple on an intense career track decide to wait to have children or not have any at all while the second, basically middle-American retards, have 20 retard kids. Then those kids have 20 retard kids and so on and so on. Cut to 1000 years later and the world is 'run' by retards. Hilarity ensues.

Hollywoodland - Poster.jpg

I love Ben Affleck. Always have. Yeah, I saw Gigli, and I didn't quite get why it got destroyed so badly, aside from the over-publicized J-Ben thing or whatever. I mean, it wasn't a good movie, but I've seen far, far, far worse from everyone in the film. But I digress! After a nice break, Ben returns with the the story behind the mysterious death of George Reeves, who played Superman in the classic television series. And no, George Reeves is no relation to Christopher Reeve (no 's' on the end. just on the chest. ha!). Anyway, what made it really interesting to watch was Ben's character rise to fame and then fall from glory, an arc I'm sure he could draw from personally. ( kind of like Courtney Love's acting in People Vs. Larry Flynt. wha? she can act? like a junkie, yeah, she's had experience.) Plus, a great supporting cast with Diane lane, Adrian Brody and Bob Hoskins.


Ah, remakes of Asian films. Though unlike the rest of the horror-remakes, we get a clever crime drama. With an insane cast, directed by Scorsese. Alec Baldwin steals every scene he's in, but barely. This is a great movie, from beginning to end, just as the original was. (Infernal Affairs is the original title). The only thing that sucked about this movie is that it has the WORST MOVIE POSTER EVER. I can't imagine anything lazier than that. I mean REALLY.


May favorite part in the movie was when Leo's character realizes that Matt Damon is the mole. Because a split second after he makes that face, what I imagined popping in his head was "Oh, shit. We're in a Scorsese movie. We're all going to die."

Part 3! Coming up!

Labels: , , , , , , ,

Friday, January 26, 2007

Chain Letter. Really.

Chain Letter. Really., originally uploaded by macslost.

OK, everyone reading this receives thousands of chain e-mails during their lifetime. It's quick and easy and computers can just replicate and blast them around as fast as anything. (sidenote: speaking of spam, when did all the pharmacy and bigger penis e-mails turn to INK & TONER spam? that's just weird)

Anyway, the other day I received a REAL LIFE chain letter. Several pages printed out and stapled in a hand-addressed envelope from one Mr. William Kelly of Lancaster, CA.

All the information I need was in the letter. Where to order a list of mailing addresses, how much money to send the the previous 7 people on the list and, of course, the half-mil I can make in ONLY 6 MONTHS!

What kills me is that these people are actually putting in the legwork and DOING it. Making copies, ordering lists and writing checks (or sending cash). I didn't think anyone did this anymore. It's so...archaic. Both in practice and in purpose.

It's just weird, really.

Labels: ,

Thursday, January 25, 2007

The Lost & The Forgotten

missing.gif, originally uploaded by macslost.

There's something to be said about cleaning out a garage. Mostly curse words, but there's definitely something therapeutic about it as well.

See, if you read earlier posts, you'd know that I really, really, really want a pool table. Really, really bad. But in order to GET said pool table, one needs to have a place to put it. Like the garage. Now, this is what the garage looked like:


and I am NOT putting a nice, brand new table in THERE. I mean, EW. So I had to scrub it and paint it. Which was NOT an easy task. The walls were so dark and dusty and slimy, it took some time to paint every nook & cranny. The CEILING was a bitch because it was all slats and hundreds of huge nails sticking out from the roofing job. Sooooo, yeah. A few nail & splinter stabbings later (& 3 weeks), it's done.

And then came the cabinets and storage containers. Stashing the tools, the paint cans, the party supplies, holiday decorations. Once that was done, I decided to empty every. single. cardboard. box. we. have.

All of them. Things that have been in boxes for 10-12 years. Personal souvenirs, old clothes, electronics, stuff we never unpacked after moving in the last 2, 3, 4 times. ALL OF IT. And it's amazing the type of crap you find.

It's also amazing to see the stuff you keep. I have all sorts of trash I have no idea where it came from, yet at some point in my life, I thought it was important enough to not only keep, but purposely stash in my "do not trash" box. Needless to say, I threw a lot of it away yesterday. If I can't remember why I had it now, I'm not going to remember LATER, for damn sure.

But the good news! I found a family heirloom that we've been looking for for a year & a half. I also found my PSP, which disappeared around the same time. Both being GREAT finds and relievers of stress.

Today I hang things, I think. I got a little tired of packing and unpacking yesterday, so I don't wanna do that no more.

In summation, my garage is gonna be a kick-ass party place by the time I'm done with it. And I am DAMNED close to being done. Maybe a week, 2 tops. but this is all the fun stuff. The decorating part. Not the paint & dirt part. Ugh.

Oh, one last thing. And a word of warning to all those out there that do not own their own house with a garage yet:

The day will come when you DO have a garage. And on that day, your parents will rise up and say: "Oh, great! Now come get all of your belongings that you left in our garage when you moved out." So, they are bringing it up this weekend. Yay.

Labels: , , , ,

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Moustache GLORY

Magnum PI movie!, originally uploaded by macslost.

This is probably a load of horsecrap, but rumor has it there WILL be a Magnum P.I. movie! And check out the cast/director!

"They say it’s been handed over to Dodgeball director Rawson Marshall Thurber, who has finished his redraft of the script adaptation of the classic ‘Magnum P.I.’ television show which made Tom Selleck and his glorious mustache famous. Sadly, Selleck will not return to playing Thomas Magnum. Instead, the word is that good old boy Matthew McConaughey has the part, with Steve Zahn as his friend Rick, Tyrese Gibson as chopper flying T.C., and William H. Macy as his British landlord Higgins. They’re sticking with the idea of Magnum and his friends being war veterans, but since so much time has passed now they’re veterans of the Iraq war."

Oh, hell yes.

Labels: , , ,

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Canadian Nature flicks RULE

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Oh damn!

DSC00160.JPG, originally uploaded by macslost.

Went outside this morning and my backyard was frozen over! Much to the chagrin of the dogs, who both slipped on the ice on the patio and ran back inside. Crazy!

Labels: ,

Saturday, January 13, 2007

The 'Best' of 2006: Part 1

'Tis the season for everyone's Top 10/Best of/Yadda yadda lists of 2006. Sooo, I figured I'd start doing one as well. Not a specific number, just a chronological listing of movies that I dug. Now, this list may seem a little random, so here's my criteria. It's very simple. Below you will find a list of movies that I remember walking out of and saying "Damn, that was pretty damn good, dammit!". There were a ton of movies that I saw where I had the lingering "That was pretty damn good, but..." Not that there was anything inherently wrong with them, they just didn't measure up to the glory I hoped they would reach. Things like Pirates 2 and The Prestige. While both are thoroughly entertaining and well done, it just didn't live up to my over-hyped expectations. And yes, I've said it before, I get WAY too excited about stuff coming out down the road. But that's fine, why do I gotta be a hater and diss on stuff? No fun in that unless it's PURE crap. Take what joy you can from life, folks, no need to run on hate. So that being said, we'll go back to February...

Yes. You see it above. It's...Paul Walker. Yeah, yeah, I know. I, too, was once on the 'Paul Walker's a douchebag' campaign trail until I realized that I actually kinda LIKE Paul Walker. Fast & the Furious, Varsity Blues, Into the Blue, Eight Below, sure there's some weak-ass crap like Timeline and The Skulls in there, but you know how I feel about crappy movies. ESPECIALLY ones with time travel. But I digress. RUNNING SCARED is a FUCKED UP movie. In the most awesome of ways. It's one of those everything-bad-you-can-possibly think-of-can-and-will-happen-in-one-night type things. It's set up like dark, dark fairy tale and the end credits are some of the coolest, creepiest things I've seen. It's violent, creepy and the black-light showdown in the hockey rink at the end is fantastic. I didn't see this in the theaters, but have watched it a few times on DVD already and it's just as good each time. I tell you, watch this one and next time you watch LOST you'll see Juliette in a whoooooole new light.

2006 best movies

I love Aaron Eckhart. Ever since I saw the way-messed-up In The Company of Men, I've had a great appreciation for that sarcastic bite of his. This movie is hilarious from beginning to end and has an awesome supporting cast, especially Maria Bello and David Koechner as his fellow 'Merchants of Death'. He plays a lobbyist for Tobacco and they play Alcohol and Firearms, respectively. While walking out of the theater, laughing my ass off, Dinah pointed out to me that no one in the movie ever lit a cigarette. Wha? Sure enough, on a repeat viewing, people will hod cigarettes, put cigars in their mouth and there's never any smoke in the whole thing. THAT is cool. How you do a movie on smoking-is-cool and not have it actually pro or con is amazing. And funny as hell.


Oooooh, V. This was one of those I had been following for a while. I remember reading Alan Moore's graphic novel yeeeeaaaaarrrrrrs ago when I worked in a comic shop in High School. It was an awesome read and I went out to pick up a new copy to re-read before the movie came out. Now, here's the difference between reading a novel or a graphic novel before seeing the flick. A NOVEL has way too much information in it to translate to film. That's why they more-or-less have to be 'adaptations'. You have to convert what would most likely be a 10-12 hour mini-series into 2 hours. And you gotta give credit where credit's due, folks. Doing that is a BITCH. A graphic novel is lucky in that it's already been storyboarded, which makes it easier to move pieces around and remove the filler for a better flick. (MOSTLY. A bad example of this is League of Extraordinary Gentleman. How you mess that one up, short as the story was, is beyond me. Retard. Notice Norrington is back to lame effects work and no more directing.) But I digress. After re-reading V, I was ASTOUNDED how accurate the movie was, up to the end. There was never any actual 'love' between V and Evey, so the ending was a little weak. But they made up for it with that awesome scene where EVERYONE is wearing the costume. That wasn't in the book, and that was a fantastic visual. So all in all, it did NOT disappoint. Plus, Hugo Weaving and Natalie Portman are two of my favorite performers, so this was a treat all around.


Crappy poster #1 on my list. Probably followed by The Departed. WTF, man? How hard is it to make a poster without a floating head or plain text?! Geez. Anyway! I have some serious man-love for Clive Owen. The man can do no wrong in my eyes. I was SHOCKED when I saw him in the abortion that is Steve Martin's 'Pink Panther' remake, but he played a 2-minute role as '006', a spy that foils a casino heist and disappears quickly, so I forgive him. Anyway, him as a brilliant bank robber against Denzel (who I also really enjoy) was a great pairing. Ever see Devil In A Blue Dress? Probably my favorite Denzel flick. I like him when he plays investigators. Plus, Denzel's right-hand man is Chiwetel Ejiofor (sadly, I have no idea how to pronounce his name) who I've been a fan of since Serenity and now notice in everything else he's in like Love Actually, Kinky Boots, Four Brothers and Children of Men. Plus, it's a heist flick. I LOOOOOOVE heist flicks. There are a few things that there are not enough of in the film world: Heists, Treasure Hunts, Quicksand and Ninjas. And this heist flick is TIGHT. I had only one gripe after it was over and it was purely of a spacial perspective to a storage room. I won't say more.


DAMN. This is a great noir flick. Set in a current-day high school with 50's detective banter, a self-created slang dictionary and an amazing cast, this movie blew me away. The whole time you're watching it, trying to figure out where the influences came from (Twin Peaks? Bogart? Veronica Mars?) and in the end it doesn't even matter, because you stop trying to guess and start trying to figure out the mystery. Keeping the audience on track with a mystery movie is tricky. You have to show them clues that they THINK they can use to figure it out, but not really. I'm not that smart. I can't write noir like this, simply because I start with a problem and work backwards to cut off future problems. Destroy the breadcrumbs. I'd be the villain that kills the hero the second I have him, without saying a word. I also wouldn't have man-sized air ducts. And my goons wouldn't have full masks. One of my favorite things about this is that two of the main characters are Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Lukas Haas. Who ever thought they would a) work again or b) in something this cool? Well done!


SLIME!!!!! MORE SLIME!!!! I like James Gunn. I think he's funny. Ever since i saw The Specials, way back when, I've been a fan (his brother is Sean Gunn of Gilmore Girls 'Kirk' fame). He also wrote the Scooby Doo live-action flicks, which weren't THAT bad and he had a damn good grasp on the subversive stuff (the fact that Scappy-Doo was the villain in one of them as AWESOME and there's some Velma lesbian stuff edited from the first movie where Fred and Velma are watching Daphne walk into a room) and he wrote the Dawn of the Dead remake, which was FANTASTIC. So here's Mr. Gunn with an 80's-throwback horror comedy that is just grosser than gross. A cross between From Beyond, Night of the Creeps, the Blob (remake) and all that. And the cast is freakin' AWESOME. Nate Fillion, of Firefly/Serenity fame (who, in my opinion, would make a GREAT Indiana Jones for future installments of the character), Elizabeth Banks of Scrubs & 40-Year Old Virgin, Michael Rooker of awesomeness and GREGG HENRY. I LOVE Gregg Henry. He plays such a smarmy douchebag in everything he's in and does it sooooo well. Plus gore. Lots and lots of gore. Just nastiness, but in that John-Waters-glee type way.


Ah, Jerri Blank. Amy Sedaris is one of the funniest people there is. Pair that with Steven Colbert and Paul Dinello in an R-rated movie version of one of my favorite TV shows and you have gold. Pure gold. One of the many, many, many treats in this one is the attention to the set pieces. The props and set decor were made by the cast and there is some AWESOME stuff hidden in there. For example, in the science lab there's a poster of a frog disection and the frog is in the crucifixtion pose and there's an periodic element chart in the shape of a cross. Plus add in some awesome cameos by Alison Janney, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker and you're good to go. The cool thing about these cameos is that these are actually friends of Amy's and did it for nothing. I read an interview with Ileana Douglas and she said she couldn't even get into the movie because there wasn't a role for her. That's the kind of awesome this one is. The only downside is that I had to leave the comfort of my Arclight Cinemas for the Laemmle Sunset 5. Listen people, 'indie' doesn't need to be 'crappy'. What a SHIT HOLE. I hate that place. Like most "indie" theaters it's one step above a homeless shelter.


Things I like to see back on track: Toned-down Sci-Fi, Richard Linklater, Robert Downey Jr. This flick as DOPE, and between Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and this, Robert Downey Jr. is back in the god-like status he once possessed 10 years ago. (plus, he's playing Iron Man, so he gets extra points for that). On the sci-fi side, I really dig the Phillip K Dick adaptations. Mostly because they have a more future-is-now quality that doesn't really have anything to do with space-travel or whatever. It's more believable technology. Blade Runner, Total Recall, Abre Los Ojos (Vanilla Sky was a remake of this), Minority Report and Paycheck were all based on his work as well. (Notice the trend of 'seeing' the future flicks? Deja Vu was like that as well) Mr. Linklater! This was a nice bounce back from Bad News Bears. Please don't remake anything again, please, sir. Then again, your adaptation of Fast Food Nation didn't get any love either. Leave that stuff to actual documentarians (is that a word?), please. The rest of the cast was great, too. Winona, Keanu and Woody (they sound like hosts of 90's kids television shows) are are pretty solid and Rory Cochrane is awesome with bugs crawling all over him throughout the movie.

OK, my hand hurts and there's still 12 to go, so I am gonna break this up into 3 parts. We'll continue this later! (oh, hey, look at that. 12 more makes an even 20. go figure.)

Labels: , , , , , , , , ,

Friday, January 12, 2007

Blades of Glory!

Blades of Glory, originally uploaded by macslost.

I can't believe that we'll get a Balls of Fury AND a Blades of Glory this year. And both look, well, magNIFicent.

The trailer for Blades of Glory just went up today. It stars Will Ferrell, Jon Heder, Amy Poehler and Will Arnett!

And it looks aaaaaaawwwwwwesome.

Labels: , , , , ,


Venom!, originally uploaded by macslost.

Well, folks! Here he is. Sideshow has shown us the toy of Venom from Spider-Man 3. And they don't mess around with this stuff, so it's pretty much EXACTLY what he'll look like.

UPDATE!! Sideshow is BUSTED. All of the links/images of the toy have been yanked from major websites around the net. Man, I bet Sony is PIIIIIISSSSSSED that their big unveiling got jacked.

Labels: , , ,

The Future of Blu-Ray

The Future of Blu-Ray, originally uploaded by macslost.

Well, according to two stories sent in to Ain't It Cool from AVN (the porn convention that "piggybacks" on CES consumer electronics convention) in Las Vegas each year, the preferred format for porn will be: HD DVD.

Now, before you get all up in my business for posting about porn in Hi-Def like some pervert that felt the money shots needed to be clearer for me on a bigger TV, the porn industry has been a huge factor in deciding the direction of past format wars when it comes to home video (I almost put 'cums' in there, but it was too easy). They were part of the reason that VHS won over Betamax, because it was cheaper to produce.

But according to this story here, it seems that Sony didn't want the dirty-dirty being produced on their precious Blu-Ray. Funny. Didn't Sony come up with Betamax, too? Do we see the trend here?

So, Blu-Ray may be a better quality disc (like Beta was better tape), but it looks like the cost factor may just lose them this battle as well.

(you can read the other story here)

Labels: , , , ,

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

The Undead die too....

The Undead die too...., originally uploaded by macslost.

After Grandpa Munster last February, the lovely Lily follows suit...

Labels: , ,



Cybersperm?, originally uploaded by macslost.

OK, I was pretty excited for the new Transformers flick, but here's a photo of the Optimus Prime and Starscream action figures in their 'protoform'. More like cybersperm. WTF? One hopes this will only be the form that hits the planet.

Like a giant fertile egg.

Labels: , ,

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Alaskan Airlincoln

I'm. Not. Crazy. Since the first day I saw the tail of an Alaskan Airlines plane I have never seen an 'eskimo', only Abraham Lincoln with an afro. This has been going on for probably 13 years and after we flew to Seattle for New Year's I got fed up with trying to explain it. It's like that optical illusion where it's either an old witch or a hot dancer with her head turned type things. (we have a wedding photo that from a distance I SWEAR it's that skinny kid from Hedwig & the Angry inch hanging from a noose. It's sick, I know, but that's what I SEE. From 12 feet, anyway.)

But I digress. I went ahead and did the mock up for you.

Alaskan Airlincoln, originally uploaded by macslost.

SEE?! Now YOU see it, too. Right? Right?

Labels: , ,

Monday, January 08, 2007

The Razzies are here!

The Razzies are here!, originally uploaded by macslost.

Once Award Season hits, most people are simply concerned with things like the Golden Globes, Oscars, SAG Awards, Writer's Guild, yadda, yadda. What we FORGET is that it's also the season for the Golden Raspberry Awards or Razzies for short!

These are the awards that honor the SHITTIEST movies of the year. Past winners include Catwoman, Showgirls, Sharon Stone, Sylvester Stallone and the list goes on and on and one. Joe Eszterhaus actually showed up to claim his award one year.

Anyway! I actually joined this year so I could vote! AND attend! The award ceremony is at the Ivar theater in Hollywood the night before the Oscars on Feb 24th.

For $25 you can vote (but you have to sign up ASAP as the voting concludes on 1/14) and they'll send you two tix for the show. I'm going! This year's nominees mostly fall under things like Shaggy Dog, Bloodrayne, Little Man, Lady in the Water, Da Vinci Code, RV and Basic Instinct 2 (which they refer to as Basically It Stinks Too).

So join up and we'll all go get drunk before the show!

And don't foget the REAL Oscar party on Sunday the 25th. This year's a-gonna be HUGE!

Labels: , , , , ,

2007: Things to look forward to.

2007: Things to look forward to., originally uploaded by macslost.

OK, OK, by 'things' I meant movies. I mean beyond that I guess you can look forward to the last Harry Potter book, but that's about it, I think.

OK! January! We're gonna start off and say that Smokin' Aces will be the big-fun for January. In fact, they made awesome little online comics with each assassin's character set-up. You can find them here:

Ain't It Cool News: Master of Disguise Lazlo Soot (Tommy Flanagan, Joel Edgerton)

ComingSoon.net: Buddy 'Aces' Israel (Jeremy Piven)

CHUD.com: The Tremor Brothers (Chris Pine, Kevin Durand and Maury Sterling)

UGO.com: FBI, Richard Messner (Ryan Reynolds)

JoBlo.com: Pasqual Acosta (Nestor Carbonell)

SmokinAces.com: Georgia Sykes (Alicia Keyes)

Boo-Ya! Field trip the weekend of 1/26 if yer in.

Also in January: Primeval (killer croc flick with the dude from Prison Break), Alpha Dog (Justin Timberlake's 'break out' role in the biopic of Jesse James Hollywood, who is trying to stop the movie as he is going to trial and the film paints him as a bad, bad man), The Hitcher remake and Epic Movie (spoof on eeeeeeeverything in the past few years: Potter, Pirates, Narnia, Snakes on a Plane...and dude, dude, dude - Crispin Glover as Willy Wonka). The rest is all drama-y and/or suck-ass. Not to say all of the above won't suck ass as well. It IS January.

Coming up in February: Ghost Rider! Black Snake Moan! Reno 911: Miami! It starts gettin' SWEET. Plus crap like Hannibal Rising and questionable things like Bridge to Terabithea, Astronaut Farmer and the Number 23.

But really, it's all just time-wasting til March gets here with 300! Zodiac! Hills Have Eyes 2! Fast Track! Fido! Sunshine! Shooter! Rescue Dawn! But wait!!!!

April brings even MORE awesomeness!!!! GRINDHOUSE!!! Hot Fuzz!! The Kingdom! Balls of Fury! OK, April doesn't have much beyond Grindhouse and Hot Fuzz, but that's OK, since you'll need to see both repeatedly.

After April? Forget it. Every single week is crammed with sequely goodness and other awesome treats. In order:

Spider-Man 3, 28 Weeks Later, Shrek the Third, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End, Knocked Up, Ocean's 13, Hostel II, Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Evan Almighty, Ratatouille, Live Free or Die Hard, Transformers, Harry Potter & The Order of the Phoenix, Hairspray, Stardust, The Bourne Ultimatum, Rush Hour 3, Super Bad, Fanboys and last, but not least, Rob Zombie's Halloween remake.

Again, there's still tons of glory to be stuffed into the cracks here, but so far, 2007 is looking to be a GREAT year for flicks.

OK, OK, Next Fall: Resident Evil: Excinction, Eastern Promises, The Golden Age, Trick R Treat, 3:10 to Yuma, 30 Days of Night, Saw 4, Mr. Woodcock, American Gangster, Bee Movie, Fred Claus, Beowolf, Enchanted, The Mist, The Golden Compass, I Am Legend, Aliens Vs. Predator 2, Charlie Wilson's War. And there will be so much more. So. Much. More.

2007 will be grand.

Labels: , ,

Thursday, January 04, 2007


I'll admit it, I read a lot of reviews on movies before I see them. Not to spoil them per se, since I usually only read the first and last few lines to get the gist of it. I like to call it managing my expectations. If you know me, you know I tend to get more psyched the further out a film is, so by the time it opens, the thrill is dampened and replaced by the urge to see something coming out a year from now (speaking of which I can't WAIT for the I Am Legend and 30 Days of Night flicks...coming out next Fall...)

But I digress. The best way I handle my expectations is to use Rotten Tomatoes, where they compile anywhere from 60-120 reviews nationwide, from TV to magazines to internet outlets. They simply grab a quick blurb that summarizes the review and give it a positive or negative skew and average them out. So in all honesty, it's the most accurate review of a movie since no one shares exact movie tastes to follow one critic or outlet.

ANYWAY, point being, you see all of the lame-ass quotes from journalists all year long and eFilmCritic.com actually keeps track of them all for their quote Whore of the Year awards. It's a fantastic read, but I am going to go ahead and post the 25 worst of the year and you can check it out for the actual awards. None of these people made the list, it's just the WORST quote.


These quotes represent the dumbest of all the dumb things said or printed for the world of film in 2006.

25. “This is an event. It’s a rare example of a film not just living up to the hype, but surpassing it. And it’s the best time you’ll have at the movies all summer, if not all year.” (Snakes on a Plane) – Christy Lemire, Associated Press

24. “Adorable owls, triumphant kids, and inviting Florida groves.” (Hoot) – Desson Thomson, Washington Post

23. “…so romantic and full of optimism that it makes me think there’s hope for us all.” (The Holiday) – Rex Reed

22. “...will get stuck in your hearts and minds!” (Stick It) – Manny the Movie Guy, NBC-TV/Palm Springs

21. “A movie treat for kids, mom, pop, brothers, sisters, uncles and, of course, aunts...” (The Ant Bully) - Gene Shalit

20. “The Gone with the Wind of rock comedies.” (Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny) – Jonathan Takiff, Philadelphia Daily News

19. A downright sweet love letter to Latino skate kids. (Wassup Rockers) – Dennis Lim, The Village Voice

18. “…made me wish I were 13 again, because this is precisely the kind of movie I would have gone nuts for.” (She’s the Man) – Wesley Morris, The Boston Globe

16 (tie). “Thoroughly engaging. Funnier than Mean Girls.” (John Tucker Must Die) – New York Post
16 (tie). “Lindsay Lohan’s funniest comedy since Freaky Friday!” (Just My Luck) – National Enquirer

14 (tie). “A movie worth celebrating. Moms, take your daughters too. You’ll both love it!” (Just My Luck) – Joel Siegel, Good Morning America
14 (tie). “The perfect comedy for moms and daughters!” (Material Girls) – Ed Carpenter, The Dove Foundation

13. “Columbo but hotter. Way, way hotter.” (Shock to the System) – Out Magazine

11 (tie). “Move over Harry Potter, watch out Narnia, there’s a new guy in town and his name is Eragon.” (Eragon) – David Moss, WJW-TV, Cleveland
11 (tie). “Look out 007, Alex Rider is in town!” (Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker) – Kevin Steincross, Fox-TV (St. Louis)

10. “A celebration of the strength it takes to be different. Halle Berry steals the show with a sensational performance.” (X-Men: The Last Stand) – David Sheehan

9. “It’s a nail-biter we’ve never seen before.” (Déjà vu) – Thelma Adams, US Weekly

8. “Already a leading contender for the year’s best animated film.” (The Wild) – Jim Svejda

7. “The best comedy since I don’t know when! One of the best American films in months” (Failure To Launch) – Stephen Hunter, The Washington Post

6. “The best superhero film since Spider-Man!” (My Super Ex-Girlfriend) – Scott Bowles, USA Today

4 (tie). “A true story you’d never expect…” (World Trade Center) - Newsweek
4 (tie). “Unmissable.” (United 93) – Richard Corliss, Time Magazine

3. “…a fascinating Cain-and-Abel tragedy that foreshadows today’s jihads and crusades.” (Beowulf & Grendel) – Queen Ann News

2. “Guillermo del Toro is the Hellboy of choice.” (Pan’s Labyrinth) – Peter Travers, Rolling Stone

1. “If you liked March of the Penguins, you’ll love An Inconvenient Truth.” – Eleanor Clift, Newsweek.com

Labels: , , ,

Wednesday, January 03, 2007


One of my favorite things about movies opening in January is how they twist marketing in their favor. See, the MAJORITY of films opening in theaters in January are the expansions of everything that needed to be released prior to 12/31 to be considered for a 2006 Oscar. So a lot of January will be filled with things like Babel, Pan's Labyrinth, etc. But hidden amongst the gems are things like...

BEST OF THE YEAR!!!, originally uploaded by macslost.

"THE CLEANER is the best comedy of the year!"

"FREEDOM WRITERS is the most touching drama of 2007"

"HAPPILY 'N' EVER AFTER is the number 1 family film!"

And they get to boast whatever they want for about 1-2 months before any real benchmarks are set.

My love for this started back when Leprechaun came out and Saturday Night Live, during Weekend Update, hailed it as the greatest movie of the year, as it was the only thing to open that weekend. Ever since, it makes me laugh when the January crap sneaks out amongst the Oscar contenders and tries to polish their shit with half-truths. It's marketing well-played, I tell ya.

Labels: , , , , ,