Get YOUR Free Miracle Spring Water!
You TOO can be an asshole. So, I wake up this morning, snap on the TV to watch '24' in TiVo and there's this Peter Popoff dick selling magic God water. Apparently if you drink it, you'll either be cured of cancer or get $5,000 unexpectedly. Seriously. I'm going to start up my own religion and sell balloons filled with the "Holy Spirit" or "Helium". America is dumb. I'm afraid I may not ever be able to leave L.A. Ever.
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